The River

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Birthday present!

You unlock this door with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension - a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You've just crossed over into the Gift Economy Zone.

UPDATE: By the way, I wouldn't recommend looking at this too long. While the colors are nice, it is, of course, unspeakably evil. J. Alva captured it for me and presented it to me to commemorate the end of my fourth year of bloggerhood and the beginning of my fifth.

This particular Cthuloid has highly advanced hypnotic powers. J. Alva says its the Cthuloid that spawned the phrase "war on terror" and directed its seeding throughout the land.

The UFO Breakfast Recipients blogger, being a foremost expert in the field, captured it quite by accident late one night when he wandered outside for a smoke. He has the fastest reflexes in the business, and of course he had a can of aerosol cheese product within easy reach.

He presented it to me for study. His gifts are always thoughtful and multi-layered but sometimes come with obligations tied to his vision of progress. He acted quite casual when he tossed it over. Like, "hey, check this out. You might be able to do something with this. Happy Birthday." I don't know where he gets his generosity of spirit and faith in his fellow man, 'cause I've never dealt with one of these things up close before, prefering to study their movements in the media.

Anyway, he neglected to warn me about its hypnotic power or its place in the overlord hierarchy. I don't know if he's absent-minded or fiendishly clever. Probably both. You know how these genius types are. I'm talking about J. Alva, not the cthuloid. The cthuloid is harmless. Anytime it gets uppity, I just show it my can of cheez-wiz. It's an odd gift, and a strange pet to have around, but my friends have always been out there.

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