The draft is TOTALLY GONNA RULE

What else is gonna be cool about a draft?

- This time around there won’t be college deferments, so even if you’re already in college, you’ll get to go. It’ll be like cutting class for four fucking years.

- At boot camp, you don’t have to hit the gym anymore because they have personal trainers to scream and beat you at 5 in the morning.

- Okay, it’s not like being a real celebrity, but Michael Moore might include your grieving mom in his next movie.

- The military will give you free health care if you lose a major body part, and they will totally pay for your funeral.