Dispatch from the future

courtesy of wunderdog

November 2nd, 2008
Crawford, Texas

Tomorrow will mark the first American presidential election in eight years. FOX News polls project a 72% lead for President George W. Bush, most likely attributable to his promise to cut taxes for the middle class.

A legal challenge to the constitutionality of President Bush’s re-election in 2008 was quashed by the Supreme Court earlier this week, which refused to hear the case. Speaking to reporters, Chief Justice Roy Moore said: “All facts directly contradict the claims of the plaintiff. There is no basis whatsoever for this case to proceed.”

The detonation of a nuclear warhead at the Chicago rally for Democratic candidate John Kerry, one week before the 2004 election, forced President Bush to declare martial law in the United States.

The attack bore all the trademarks of Osama Bin Laden, who had narrowly escaped Task Force 5 in Afghanistan. TF5, a crack Special Forces unit, was redeployed after it became clear that Bin Laden was no longer in Asia and that those who had aided his escape were in Iraq.

When rioting broke out across the United States in the aftermath of the bombing, President Bush promptly called U.S. troops home from Iraq to deal with the domestic situation. The chaos created by the blast, as well as the loss of a majority of the Democratic Party’s leadership, necessitated postponement of the election. Those protesting the declaration of martial law were detained, and the nation began its march towards recovery.

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UPDATE: Cyndy informs us that Margaret Atwood saw this coming about 20 years ago.