The River

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Ask not for whom the pols chitter...

It's happening. Not just in the United States, but all over North America. Chittering. You go to your favorite web site, and it's there. You wake up in the morning, disturbed by...something.... Is that...chittering? It is. It's chittering.

When I wake up in the morning, I usually get up without delay. But this morning I awoke to a kind of muffled chittering sound. I thought at first it was the heat vent which often does that when it is not adjusted quite right. But when I realized the furnace wasn’t even running, I was really bewildered. And what was most amazing about the sound was I could only hear it when my head was under the blankets. It sounded like a conversation of some sort but too muffled to make out the words. But it sounded like "Two cheats due to win."

Two cheats due to win? What could it mean? The...the...the Presidential election? No!

Yet, it makes perfect sense, doesn't it?

You'll know when you hear the sound of chittering in the morning.

Artist conception of the 2008 U.S. Presidential election

UPDATE: There's more. College students awakening. A sign of hope?

This unbridled skwerlhuggery would have continued had it not been for a chance encounter that I had with the Scary Squirrel World website while checking email one day. Feelings of fear, anger and betrayal swept over me as I read the TRUTH about Tufty the Traffic Safety Squirrel and his bushy-tailed minions. I was encouraged, though, by the reports of brave Patriots fighting the nut devils on their own campuses, and I left for home determined to no longer be a pawn of Tufty and his hordes. When I got home, I explained the truth to my roommate and we made a pact to actively resist the skwerl onslaught.

UPDATE II: Once again, UFO Breakfast is recognized by Google for its yeoman work on this issue. #1 for "chittering democrat."

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