The River

Monday, March 12, 2007

Reduce Re-use Recycle Rebrand




Being the fine citizen journalist he is, Scruggs has uncovered inside information revealing that "Ford is currently attempting to rebrand itself with names that more reflect the “everyday hopes and desires of the American people”. SUVs, in particular, are targeted.

Scruggsie has a few of his own suggestions. Here are a few more:

DeForester SLX

Crusher 4X4

X-Stream Widebody

OVR Compensator

Incinerator FX

Stryker

Armageddon XT

DeathWhish 2000

posted by Bruce at 10:44 AM
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Comments:
LOL, I'll take an "Armaggedon XT."

The vehicle pictured, the Lincoln version of the Ford Expedition, rear-ended us two years ago while we were stopped at a light. We were in a Subaru WRX at the time. My wife and baby were fine, thankfully, but I injured the front of my neck under the clavicle and got Thoracic Outlet Syndrome. Which, unfortunately, is less fun than it sounds.
# posted by Blogger MarcLord : 3:06 PM
 
damn, sorry to hear that, Marc.

I have a feeling I'll be using the "Specialized HardRock" more often in the near future.
# posted by Blogger Bruce : 4:11 PM
 
The Ford Priapus XL
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 9:02 PM
 
Thanks Bruce! Fortunately, alcohol is one of the few things which relieves it.

Ford could actually brand and market a smaller vehicle for the active lifestyle called the Vivisect. You know, something like a Honda Element. "Vivisect" says peppy...optimistic...and international. It would befit an eco-friendly theme, and its tagline could be, "Vivisect: Slice Life Wide Open!"
# posted by Blogger MarcLord : 11:20 PM
 
Good one, Marc!

And Michael. XL, of course

This is fertile ground for creative types
# posted by Blogger Bruce : 11:59 PM
 
i like yours bruce they made me laugh.
# posted by Blogger barbara : 10:05 PM
 
How about the Ford Decanter ?

You gotta have read Brave New World to get my jejune humour.
# posted by Blogger jonhusband : 3:11 AM
 
Sounds pretentious.

It's been forever since I read the novel.

(hello, Barbara. thanks!)
# posted by Blogger Bruce : 9:46 AM
 
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